Optical Illusion

Window’s View from Ayu’s Apartment, Melbourne 2010

When 6 degrees in Melbourne means 22 degree in Washington, I have my black coffee with a slice of blueberry cheesecake. There is a quote from one of romantic drama movie “My Blueberry Night” scene when Jude Law give his analogy about relationship.

“At the end of every night a cheese cake and the apple pie are always completely gone. There’s piece cobbler and chocolate mousse cake are nearly finish. But it’s always a whole blueberry pie left untouched. So what’s wrong with the blueberry pie? It’s nothing wrong with the blueberry pie. People make another choices, you can’t blame the blueberry pie, it’s just no one wants it.”

This is actually story about “Our Secret Goodbye”

Nothing more self-hurting than letting you off out my door. The longest detachment trough a whole love story. It was December 2008, first summer in my life, first time I saw you. There you are appear in front of my door, standing behind your best friend. Geezz, how I miss those warm summer, as seasons changing for the second time. It was a marvelous time to held a house warming. Glasses toast of wine, bottles of beer, Daniel’s home made cookies, I still reckon that’s the best home made cookie I ever had in Melbourne. He probably made those cookies with love for my best friend which he never admit it. All I can see is a smile in corner of my bedroom which also functions as living room. Smiling quietly in your secret way, like 5 watt bulb, bright and soft.

Is there any such thing called love at first sight? Now I just thought that was just a merely bedtime story. Sight-See-Eyes = Optical Illusion? In my opinion, that was something that you are unworthy believe. Maybe, since eyes were located near to your brain, they will give spontaneous response to process an idea or perception in your mind. While heart in the other hand, need to work harder to give an idea about what you feel about someone for the first time. You need time to understand what your heart says about someone, but believe me it’s worthed. Can you imagine how heart functioned to flow blood trough all of your body, it makes all your nerves and sense work properly. You can let your eyes to have a rest, but not with you heart. Your heart will continue working to keep you alive.

When you saw someone at first, your heart wouldn’t have any change to give its response directly, meanwhile your eyes will tell whatever may appear with it. Yeah maybe, your heart too busy doing its main job than to tell the truth about what other senses felt about what’s happened. I trust my heart more than my eyes when I am falling in love. Maybe the symptoms appear to be a raise on your blood, faster beat of your heart, reddish complexion in your skin tone, warmth temperature of your cheek. You might still want to denied it, but you cannot avoid it.

For me, what ever happened to my heart when you walking out of my door at your last day in Melbourne. It cries pouring blood everywhere trough small holes, it needs another one summer and two times of winter to let my heart working on you again. Hey but, I just find out that it works stronger now, a lot of more better than the first time.

So you are my blueberry pie, I won’t touch you two years before. But I’ll keep you a whole piece in the end of the day and have you as my dinner. Since I don’t want to share any slice of you with the others, I still have to wait to touch you for the next of two years.

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